The intern Rebuttal
“Ten Things You Should Know about the Interns”

1) Yes, you work like a dog. So do we
I know your company doesn’t pay me, but these bills don’t pay themselves, and that schoolwork (the kind that technically costs me money) doesn’t either.
2) Yeah, my work is shitty. That’s why I’m here
I’m sorry I didn’t know how to do that, or that other thing, or that thing yesterday. But I’m working on it. Please, please, please bear with me.
3) I’m not just cheap labor. I’m actually your student
I’m here because I know some things and will learn some more. I learn by doing and you teach by fixing.
4) You want perfection? Pay me
Is this a question best suited for a spoiled little child? Yes. But the truth is, if I was expected to do everything as well as you, I’d be an employee, not “the intern.”
5) Would you like me to take directions or take initiative?
Yeah, I know how to mindlessly do tasks: I went to college. I also know how to do things differently and present ideas. Which would you prefer?
6) Yes, I’m listening…can you repeat that?
Sometimes I have a question and no matter how many times I try to phrase it the question is just…dumb. Asking a stupid question is embarrassing. I spent all that time looking like I’m listening (and I was) but occasionally it’s hard to remember things when you’re, well, trying to remember things.
7) I’m…scatterbrained. Deal with it.
My phone makes restaurant reservations, gives me stock tips, and lets me play Tetris. Do you think I ever do one thing at a time anymore? So I’m sorry I don’t do everything in order. We occasionally work in different ways. Yes, we’re “using each other.” But it doesn’t have to feel that way
An unpaid internship is two things: a line on my resumé (and hopefully a letter of recommendation) and a new, unpaid worker for you. But if I’m a good intern (and you’re a good employer) it never has to feel like that. You hired me because you liked something about me and I applied because I liked something about you.
9) You and me, we come from different worlds
Yes, this is a line from a Hootie and the Blowfish song, but it’s still true. Sometimes it’s hard for us to relate, the 30-year-old married man with children who likes to fish and the female senior in college whose hobbies include “keg stands” (no, not really). The point is, we’re not going to “get” each other every time.
10) I’m a person, not “the intern.”
I’m sorry your last intern burnt your coffee. But I am not your last intern, I’m your new one. And, um, sorry about the coffee.

<3 The Intern (Summer 2010)

http://www.leonardomoreira.com.br/apple-responds-adobe/

http://gizmodo.com/5529665/apple-might-face-antitrust-inquiry

http://mashable.com/2010/04/27/android-flash/